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Finding Me Page 9


  “You hush, Bill,” Mom huffed as she sat across from Dad at the table. “My Owen is still my baby.”

  “Tonight he’ll do what every other red-blooded man on his twenty-first birthday does: get drunk and collect birthday kisses from pretty girls.” Dad arched an eyebrow at me as Mom giggled across the table.

  I chuckled as I poked at my food. “Nah, Dad. I have a girlfriend. Just looking forward to a night out with the guys.”

  “You know something, sweetie?” Mom asked as she passed me the bread. “This is the first time I remember you ever saying you had a girlfriend. Usually your tried and true answer was just a girl I know. And there were plenty of girls you knew hanging around here before you moved so far away from us.”

  My going to Culver was a constant source of contention with my mother. It seemed like an odd choice to her, but Culver had a decent hockey team—even though they sucked at the time of my admission—and they had a sports marketing program in their business school. Dad agreed it was a smart move all around. My grades and recommendations from my high school hockey coach earned me an almost full scholarship, so it was a no brainer as far as I was concerned. Though that didn’t help the pang of guilt at my mother’s stream of tears before every departure back to school.

  “Bella’s special, Mom. She’s not like any girl I’ve ever met. She’s beautiful, smart, and real. The polar opposite of any girl I used to know.” I gave Mom a wry grin as I teased her. “You’d love her.”

  A slow smile spread across her face. “We need to meet this Bella, then. Why don’t you ask her to come home with you for Spring Break? Lord knows we have plenty of room here for her to stay.”

  “Absolutely. I know a thing or two about chasing your dreams and finding a girl along the way.” Dad glanced wistfully over at Mom. Back in the day, he was only supposed to be in Savannah for a few months, but then he met Mom and never left.

  “We’ll see, Mom. Listen, I told the guys I’d meet them in an hour.” I leaned over to kiss her forehead and squeezed her hand. “Thanks for dinner. I’ll ring in twenty-one without the need of a clean-up crew here. Everyone wins, right?”

  Everyone except me. My head would be a thousand miles away with the city girl I left for the holidays.

  I sat at the end of the crowded bar, Moon River beer bottle in my hand, and peered over the crowd. I knew most of the people here, as everyone was home from wherever they went to school. Bluegrass Saloon was the place in town for college kids to drink with no questions asked. But I was twenty-one today. Well, as of a half hour ago. Being in a bar that didn’t ask for my ID felt sacrilegious, but I didn’t want to drink alone. My January eleventh birthday made me older than all my friends, so in order to celebrate with my still underage crew, this was our only option.

  “Owen … my oldest friend … happy fucking birthday,” my friend Josh slurred as he saluted me with a tequila shot and draped his unsteady arm around me. I shook my head as I helped him onto the bar stool next to me. I laughed and waved the bartender down for some water. Josh was an emotional drunk. I figured it’d be best to sober him up a bit before he started crying into his beer declaring his love for all of us.

  I, on the other hand, wasn’t even a little drunk, or having all that good a time. Something was off.

  “What’s the matter with you tonight? You’re twenty-one, dude! We’re all together before we head back to school on Sunday. Why the hell do you look like someone kidnapped your puppy?” My other oldest friend, Colton, narrowed his eyes at me in confusion. “Shelby,” Colton pointed behind him with his thumb, “is here with her friends tonight, and she’s been eyeing you since they walked in. Maybe she’ll give you a nice present, for old times’ sake.” Colton winked at me. “She looks even better than she did in high school.”

  “Yes.” I nodded. “She does. But I told you, I have a girlfriend. Not interested in hooking up tonight, birthday or not.” I turned to gulp the last of my beer.

  “A girlfriend in New York, who wouldn’t be the wiser. What happens at Bluegrass, stays at Bluegrass. Plus, what’s going to happen at the end of the semester? She’s up there, you’re here. It can’t last anyway.” Colton slapped my shoulder as he made his way over to Shelby and her friends.

  He was an asshole, but he made sense. We’d only been separated three weeks, and it was torture. I was the pussy-whipped boyfriend who texted his girl all day long and Skyped twice a day, and it still didn’t seem like enough. In May, I’d have to leave her for three months. How could I afford to go there or get her down here? It was silly; I should back off so things didn’t get weird or complicated, right? Thinking of ending things with Bella made my chest constrict. I didn’t want to relive old times with Shelby or anyone else. I wanted my girl. My smart, beautiful, secret tiger in bed, City. Why wasn’t I able to stay away from her or put distance between us so neither of us got hurt?

  Because I loved her.

  The realization knocked the wind out of me. I liked a lot of girls, sure, but none of them ever got me this twisted—probably because I didn’t love any of them. I didn’t know when it happened. All I did know, was there was no going back.

  “Owen? Dude? What’s with you tonight?” Colton’s irritated tone brought me back to the present.

  “You know what? It’s late, and I head back up to school tomorrow night. I only had one beer, so I can drive home. Make sure Josh doesn’t.” I motioned to Josh’s slumped body on the stool next to me.

  “It’s only twelve-thirty, but all right. Safe travels, buddy!” Colton shook my hand and slapped my back.

  My phone buzzed in my pocket as I strode to my car.

  BELLA: Happy birthday! I wish I was with you!

  ME: Thanks, City. Me, too. I’m headed home. You up for a while?

  BELLA: Yeah, I can stay up. Skype me when you get home.

  ME: Miss me that much?

  BELLA: Yes, even though you’re a cocky bastard.

  I loved when Bella called me on my bullshit and gave it right back to me. Any other girl paled in comparison to her, in every way.

  I pulled into my driveway and crept through the house and into my bedroom to turn my computer on.

  “Hey,” Bella whispered. The screen was dark, but I could still see her gorgeous face as she grinned at me. “Why are you home so early? I thought when you turned twenty-one you got shit faced the whole night and didn’t come home until dawn.”

  I chuckled and shrugged. “I just wasn’t feeling it. It would have been a lot more fun if you were here.”

  She grinned as she rested her head against her hand. “I would have loved to be with you today.”

  I rested my computer on my lap as I lay back on my bed. “What would we have done if you were here?” I raised an eyebrow at Bella.

  She pursed her lips at the screen. “Really, Owen?”

  I chuckled and nodded my head. “I’m serious. Would you have made me a cake?”

  Bella nodded. “Sure. I make an awesome red velvet cake.”

  “My favorite, perfect! What else? How do you spend your birthday?”

  “Every year, my mom tells the story of the day I was born. Usually, it ends with her in tears and my dad making faces behind her back to make us laugh.”

  “I’d probably like your dad. If he ever let me in the house, that is.”

  A sad smile spread across Bella’s face and her eyes darted from the screen. The line between her brows was back.

  “He’s easy to like.”

  “Tell me about the day we met.”

  Bella crinkled her nose at the screen. “The day we met?”

  “Well, you can’t tell me about the day I was born. Tell me about the day a hockey player with a bandana and a cup of coffee rocked your world.”

  Bella burst out laughing. “I actually don’t count that day as when we first met.”

  “Oh, City. Don’t take that away from me. I still think of that hot scowl on your face.” I wiggled my eyebrows and Bella sighed.

  “I
think of that day in accounting class. When you walked me half way across campus just to talk to me and got embarrassed when I called you on it. I got to see the sweet and humble Owen behind the OT everyone talked about. That’s when I met you for the first time. And that’s when I decided I wanted to know more.”

  I blinked as I dropped my gaze from the screen. I found a girl who wanted me for my imperfections, not my status. Bella wanted me for who I was, not what she could get from being with me. In that moment, I knew I would never be able to let her go. Bella was one in a million.

  “So, listen.” Bella leaned over to turn her lamp on. “Everyone is asleep, so I thought I’d give you a little birthday present preview.” She dropped the computer on the edge of her bed and backed away. Her hands disappeared at the bottom of the screen as she pulled the hem of her oversized Yankees T-shirt up and over her head.

  My breath hitched. “Are you stripping for me? Now that is what I call a happy birthday. I would have come home hours ago if I knew this was waiting for me.” I grinned as she came close to the screen and pressed her index finger to her lips.

  “Shhhh … I think you’re the one who needs to learn to be quiet.” Bella backed away, and she was in nothing but a red lace bra and barely there red lace thong. I swallowed and moved my computer off my lap since, thanks to the picture on my screen, it wouldn’t lay flat across my pants.

  “So … happy birthday.” She pivoted slowly so I could see every inch of every amazing curve of her body. Her long dark hair cascaded down her back in waves. My mouth watered remembering how sweet she tasted when I ran my lips all over her. I wanted to rip that bra off and stick my hand down those next to nothing panties, make her squirm and moan and come undone beneath me. I needed to touch her before I lost my damn mind. I needed her, period.

  Bella craned her head at the screen as a playful smirk ticked up the side of her mouth.

  I let out an audible sigh. I never had a chance with this girl. She owned me.

  “Bella … you’re … God, I can’t take it. That’s how beautiful you are. It’s too much.”

  She gazed down and smiled. “I bought this for Monday night. If you still want me to stay over, that is.”

  “I may never let you out of bed. I hope you don’t have early classes on Tuesday. You’re going to be up late.”

  Bella crawled back on the bed and brought her face closer to the camera. “I miss you so much.”

  I bit my lip as I smiled back at her. I didn’t want to tell her I loved her over Skype. I needed to be in person, face to face, so I could kiss her and touch her and know if she felt the same way.

  “I miss you too, City. More than you know. Get some sleep. I’ll text when I wake up.”

  “Okay. Dream of me.” Bella blew a kiss at me and laughed. I lived for that sound.

  “Always do. Sweet dreams.” I closed the screen and lay back with my eyes closed.

  It didn’t matter where our homes were. We were meant to be together. I’d find a way to make that happen.

  Bella

  LESS THAN FOUR HOURS BACK at school and already my head was spinning. Math classes had always been a breeze for me, but the syllabus for junior-level finance sounded downright scary. Starting school at seven fifty-five on Monday mornings wasn’t my best decision. By ten-thirty, it felt as if a whole day had gone by. This semester was going to be a bitch, plain and simple.

  I slipped and slid all the way from the business school building. I’d never given much thought to what the North Pole looked like, but I’d bet upstate New York held a close resemblance. Winter had turned the lush rolling campus landscape into icy death-traps.

  I shot a good morning text to Owen on my way to philosophy class, texting quickly so I could put my gloves back on. He got back on Saturday but his coach had been running the team ragged because of the long break. We only had time for a five-minute phone call before he passed out last night.

  I’d been dreaming about our reunion for days after missing him for weeks. Now he was right here and I couldn’t see him yet. I wanted Owen, and I wanted him now. The longing from afar was getting on my nerves.

  I sighed at my blank phone screen when I arrived at the liberal arts building. The dejected face I spied in my reflection as I opened the glass door was almost comical. I stomped the slush off my boots as a familiar arm wrapped around my waist and pulled me back.

  “There she is!” My head snapped in the direction of the deep voice behind me. Owen. My God, he was beautiful. The smile across his face lifted his cold-reddened cheeks. He arched a playful eyebrow under his knit hat and I squealed as I wrapped my arms around him. Owen laughed and picked me up by the waist. I couldn’t wrap my legs all the way around him under my down coat but my arms clung on to his neck for dear life.

  Owen pulled my hood down and chuckled. “You in there, City?” Grabbing his face, I took his lips in a fierce kiss. I clutched his jacket and moaned into his mouth. When his tongue caressed mine, the tingles between my legs made me grip him even harder. The bristles of stubble around his mouth scraped my skin but I didn’t care. I wanted to be as close to him as I could get in a public place and under four layers of clothing.

  Owen dropped me back to the ground and slid his arms around my waist. My breathing was heavy as I buried my head into his chest.

  “I missed you a little.”

  Owen chuckled and lifted my head to kiss my lips. “Just a little? I missed you a lot. I’ve been a moody bastard since I got here. All because I couldn’t see my girl yet.” I pulled him by the neck into another kiss. After spending weeks yearning for those lips, now that I had them back it was impossible to pull away.

  “Bella? Um … we should get inside the classroom,” Laura stumbled out with a laugh behind me. My little reunion with Owen made it completely slip my mind that Laura and I had philosophy together this semester and she was supposed to wait for me outside class.

  “Happy New Year, Laura,” Owen murmured while still kissing me. He gave Laura a side wave.

  I groaned and dropped my forehead to Owen’s chest. “I better go. See you later?”

  A smirk tickled the side of his mouth before he inched his lips toward my ear and sucked on my earlobe. “I told you. You’re staying with me,” he whispered into my ear. “You. Naked. In my bed.”

  The shudder that rushed through my system had nothing to do with the subzero temperatures outside. “All our time apart made you a caveman.” I bit Owen’s bottom lip and chuckled at the growl that escaped his throat.

  “No, my smoking hot girlfriend teasing me over Skype is what made me a caveman.” Owen nuzzled my neck. “When I get you home, I’m going to put you over my shoulder—”

  “Ahem.” A skinny bald man stood in the classroom doorway and glared at us. I assumed he was my professor. “Mr. Thompson, is there somewhere you need to be?”

  “Sorry, Professor Ryan. Just walking my girl to class, sir.” Owen gave me a sheepish grin and kissed my forehead.” He mouthed ‘later’ against my swollen lips before he sauntered away.

  “Good morning, Professor. Sorry.” My cheeks heated in embarrassment as I slid into a seat next to Laura. A smile was plastered on my face as I reached into my bag for my notebook. I suddenly didn’t give a shit about the snow in my hair or the fifty pages I already had to read tonight.

  An Owen fix was better than coffee.

  “Hey, Bella. Happy New Year!” Ethan greeted me with a warm smile as I strolled through their apartment door. I followed him up the stairs with my overnight bag.

  “Make yourself at home. Help yourself to whatever food you can find in the kitchen. We should probably go shopping.” Ethan gave me a smirk as he strode back to his room.

  Owen had to run drills after his classes and asked me to meet him at the apartment. I laughed to myself as I settled into his room. If my parents only knew where I was right now. I wasn’t even allowed to have Christian at the house alone, and the door to my room couldn’t close when he did come over. Luckily,
or unluckily depending on how you looked at it, his parents didn’t have the same rule. This was one hundred percent different. The things I did with Owen, and planned to do, were on a different level than dry humping until we heard the doorknob turn.

  “Hey,” Ethan called from the hallway, pulling me from my thoughts and scaring the crap out of me. “I’m heading out until tomorrow morning, and Andy isn’t supposed to come home tonight. You okay by yourself?”

  “Sure, don’t worry about me.” I sat on Owen’s bed with my legs folded under me. At least that eased my mind about them hearing us. It also gave me an idea I wasn’t sure I had the guts to pull off.

  I jogged to the window and watched Ethan drive the truck the guys shared out of the lot. Owen said he’d be here before seven, and it was six forty-five. I gazed over at the tiny desk where Owen kept his books and laptop and noticed a shot of us from the Halloween party tacked onto his bulletin board. We looked so blissfully happy it was nauseating. Owen was holding me from behind and I held his hammer above my head. Both of us beamed at the camera. I shuddered at the memory of getting acquainted with his other hammer up against the wall the same night.

  It was recently his birthday. And he’d been crystal clear about one thing he wanted. I shut the blinds in his room and stripped off my clothes, leaving on only the bra and panties I modeled for Owen on Skype. Along with food shopping, maybe the boys should’ve checked the heat too. I shivered as I crawled into Owen’s bed and pulled the sheets and blanket up to my neck. Gooseflesh broke out on my skin as I dropped the back of my head onto Owen’s pillow in defeat. Seduction wasn’t my thing.

  “City, you better be in here!” Owen called from the front door as he stomped up the stairs. “I’m sorry Ethan left you alone; I didn’t realize they both wouldn’t be—” He froze in the doorway and gaped at me. I shrugged and pulled my hand out from under the covers to wave.

  “Bella, are you …” Owen nodded in my direction, his emerald eyes dark and wide.

  “Naked and in your bed. Per your request.” I grinned as I pulled the sheets down a bit to show Owen his homecoming outfit. I leaned forward and rested on my elbows. The bra pushed my boobs up so high they were almost up to my neck. “Happy belated birthday!”